peanut m&ms

peanut m&ms may just be my favorite candy. i'll eat just about anything sweet, but i crave these. for instance, on thursday before my exam i really almost bought some in the vending machine because my taste buds wanted the peanut/chocolate experience. pushing the cravings aside, i went to take my exam and to my surprise my teacher had brought us candy - and in the bucket were tiny yellow bags of peanut m&ms. i was a happy camper.

that story was rather pointless. in fact, this blog may be altogether pointless but i feel the need to word vomit.

i'm so thankful i have a mother and father who don't mention my relationship status. i'm thankful for single friends who are lovely and who challenge me in the Lord. i'm thankful for my friends who are dating too - so thankful that they teach me and seek the Lord in their relationships. generally, at the end of the day - i like my life and i'm thankful. i'm content and i'm happy, and i'm excited.

but you know those characters in the chick flicks who are portrayed as the run-down single woman with no prospects, with all the people who feel the need to remind her of her seemingly hopeless relationship status? some nights i feel like her. i hate that feeling. i hate feeling like i'm older than i am, as though i'm already in my thirties and my time is running out to meet someone. i hate feeling like i have to try to get a guys attention, then try to keep it - as though it's all a game. you know those women who get up at ridiculous hours of the morning to put on makeup because their husbands have never seen them without it. they're perfect always - hair never out of place, legs always smooth, makeup in place - a tee-shirt and jeans would never been a legitimate outfit to wear to the grocery store. there's nothing wrong with them - its just not me. and i'm hoping there's nothing wrong with me either.

i woke up this morning, took a shower, threw on a sweatshirt and some shorts, threw up my hair in a rather haphazard way and opted to give my pores a break from makeup. i went to work for my dad. i helped a kindergartener do his homework of coloring, cutting and pasting, and we tossed the football.
i guarentee you i didn't look sexy. no one asked me out. there were no proposals or fireworks. there was a lot of rain, a lot of coloring, and a lot of laughter... and at the end of the very long day that was today, there were peanut m&ms on the counter when i got home.

end of girly emotional post.